Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Tying One On

We have two dogs.  Our shitzu/papillion, Wags, who will be 6 this summer and Mindy, our havanese, who will be 2 this spring.  Not having a dog or dogs was never an option for us because my mom is, well, she is THE CRAZY DOG LADY.  I often kid that in our home growing up, the condiments on our table always included dog hair.  If there wasn't dog hair in our food, it was like it was missing salt and pepper. 

Long ago my mom decided that dogs would replace us of the human variety to fill her need to nurture as we all left home.  I don't think it's a coincidence that she always has three dogs in her home at any given time as growing up in our home she attempted valiantly to raise two sets of three kids (as one set moved out, another set moved in - long story).  As she dealt with the inevitable "empty nest syndrome" as we all finally moved out, the dogs filled the void with their crazy antics, their undying adoration of her and their need to be cared for.

And so it goes that in our family, if you don't have a dog she feels compelled to bestow one upon you.  I don't even think my last kid was hatched before she laid claim to the right to be the one to provide HER grandchildren with a puppy.  I held her off as long as I could with my convincing act of being wildly overwhelmed with the diapering/breastfeeding/toilettraining/tryingtogetthe
darnthingstosleep routine.  But 6 years ago, two days before our bi-yearly visit from Grandma, the phone rang and she accomplished one of her purposes for living.  She had just seen the CUTEST litter of small breed puppies with a little fellow that would fit perfectly into our home, our yard and our hearts and as our youngest was now over two, IT WAS TIME.  I hastily called Ken at work expecting him to buoy up my resolve to say no,no,no! but we were both sucked into her enthusiasm and hopelessly committed to whatever little fluffball she managed to smuggle onto the flight to Winnipeg from Whitehorse.

And when Grandma put this little one into our then 6 year old Brenna's arms and he wagged his tail as if his life depended on it, he was aptly christened Wags by her and officially made a new member of the Symanski clan.  And truly I get why my mom is THE CRAZY DOG LADY.  Wags has been a great addition to the family and has given us much to laugh about.  And when it was time to move to the Yukon it's as if he knew he was back where he was born.  It helps that when we go to visit at Grandma's and Grandpa's he gets to see his cousins, Koda (a beautiful and extremely large German Shepherd), Maggie (a fourteen year old Border Collie who is the matriarch of the clan) and Foxy (a rescue dog, who came to live with my parents when they fostered her and her gazillion pups from the animal shelter.  The pups all got successfully adopted out and Foxy found her forever home with Mom and Dad).  Wags loves this crew so much that upon entering the city limits seeing the signs welcoming us to Whitehorse (he reads "Grandma and Grandpa's House"), he begins to launch himself through the windshield.  He seems convinced that the 100 km/hr that we are driving is too slow and surely he can get there faster if only he was given the chance. 

But I should have known we were not complete as a dog loving family.  I thought we were done.  But Grandma knows best and so now we have little Mindy.  I heard about her months and months before meeting her.  Mom knew about this dear little havanese pup that needed a home and every so often tried to convince me that she would be PERFECT for our family now that we had a larger yard and "look how much Wags loves having other dogs around..." I should've known I was done for.  This spring, through a series of crazy events, Mindy became a Symanski.  And I have to say, she is a piece of work.  Havanese are a sweet breed known for getting very attached to one person.  Well, I am her person.  She adores me.  And now that I've entered that lovely stage were my darling, little children can eloquently, passionately, convincingly form the words, "I HATE YOU" and "YOU ARE THE WORST MOTHER IN THE WHOLE WORLD!", Mindy is my solace.  I am perfect in her sight.  When I enter the room I swear you hear the Hallelujah Chorus singing in her little heart.  I, Dianna Symanski, can do no wrong.

Now, why you ask, is this long rambling post called "Tying One On"?  Well because they did.  Wags and Mindy.  They did the wild thing, made the beast with two backs, they tied one on!  In the dog world that doesn't mean they got drunk.  And although I had heard the term "tying" in relation to dogs mating from my wise, German Shepherd breeding sister, I had no idea what it looked like.

Don't get me wrong I didn't think it was moonlight and roses and wooing or even "Paradise By The Dashboard Light".  Having never actually seen dogs "do the deed", how was I to know that when they "tie" they actually get stuck together!  Colour me surprised when I walked in on these two little lovebirds and found them looking up at me (a little embarrassed I think!) completely unable to disengage from their little rendezvous.  Both Ken and I flew into action while our children looked on with amazement and bewilderment.  I did what anyone would do.  I panicked and called my sister and my brother-in-law and they talked me off the ledge explaining that this was normal and that they would go their separate ways when they, well, could.  Ken, however had a very different response and immediately dimmed the lights and put on Marvin Gaye.  That's my guy!

So now we are faced with the reality that in February we will have puppies in our home. February 14 is Mindy's due date!  Of course we're having all kinds of discussions with the kids about this (tomorrow's post)  and we get a real kick out of the fact that our puppies will be HavaShitz.  Our kids giggle their butts off because we rarely swear around them (Ken - never, me - no comment) but we're just having too much fun asking people if they want a HavaShitz!

By the way... do YOU want a HavaShitz?  giggle, giggle, hee, hee

Jesus,

Oh my, what has my mother gotten us into!?  I admit that once again she was right when it came to adding Wags and Mindy to our family.  But please, please, please don't let the mantle of THE CRAZY DOG LADY fall on me.  I love you!

'til next time,

Dianna

7 comments:

  1. MAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!!! I am going to pee my pants laughing!! Oh, what a post!! Seriously, there are tears in my eyes.

    HavaShitz.... oh my gosh. What a hoot. You need to post pictures of your dogs so we can get an idea as to what the combination might look like.

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  2. This made my Wednesday...a HAVASHITZ!!!! LMAO:)

    I remember the many dinners that included a "side dish" of dog hair!! Unfortunately this seems to be an occasional side dish in my house 15+ yrs later with a Rotti~Lab ruling the roost!!

    As for "tying one on" when I was in Cuba I took a picture of the cuties doggies in Havanna only to realize after I took the picture they were "stuck" together...needless to say I got some weird looks for taking the picture from the locals!

    Loving the posts - keep them coming:) Mel xo

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  3. Oh my God, laughing out loud feels really good and doesn't happen nearly often enough in everyday life! Thank you for the laughs!

    Please post some pics of the dogs and, of course, of the puppies!

    KP

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  4. hahahaha, at least its a bull dot + a shitzhu, then you'll get a bullshit! hahaha

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  5. No, I don't want one.
    Are you surprised?

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  6. You are too funny! Well written Diane. My kids are dying for a puppy, of any kind, but Ron and I can't agree so . . . . we don't. But what does a HavaShitz look like? And how in the world would we get him or her?

    - Lynne Decock

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  7. The Crazy Dog Lady has tried numerous times to bestow upon me the gift of eternal loyalty, hair in my food,and sloppy kisses. I'm caving sis!!! Help!!!!

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